Gay touch relaxation – turn yourself on, switch yourself off
Many gay folks struggle with anxiety or stress – but did you know you can use touch to help your relaxation process?
Have you ever wished you could turn your brain off… stop it whirling round and round in ever-increasing circles?
Anxiety can be a common experience for queer people, and there are lots of alternative relaxation tips out there for gay men.
But most gay guys probably wouldn’t think of touch as being a way to enhance that relaxation process.
Touch can help still the mind
A few nights ago I couldn’t sleep. I tried some mindful meditation: bringing my focus to my breath as it flowed in and out; returning my awareness to my breath every time it wandered off.
But it wasn’t enough – my mind seemed to wander off more quickly than I could catch it!
And then I remembered Betty Martin’s advice that our bodies are a powerful tool when it comes to helping still the mind.
As she points out: it’s not about turning the mind off so much as switching your body on.
Feeling sensation can help down regulate your body
On a physiological level bringing our attention to sensation in our skin actually helps switch the brain from being ‘active’ (all that over-thinking, chattering and judging) into being ‘receptive’ – switching our nervous systems from the ‘Sympathetic’ (fight-or-flight mode) to the ‘Parasympathetic’ (relaxation mode).
As I lay awake I wondered whether some of the techniques I use with my clients to help connect them with what they can actually feel in their body might also help me quieten down my over-active grey matter.
Learn more about how
Start with your hands
Alongside our lips and our genitals our hands contain the highest concentration of nerve endings in our body.
If you want to kick-start sensation, even without getting sexy, then hands are a great place to go to!
So for gay folks who want a touch relaxation practice, here’s a 5 minute sensate-focus exercise you can benefit from as a meditation any time, anywhere to help get you out of your mind and into your body. And maybe even off to sleep!
Learn more about how touch can be fundamental to your wellbeing
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